Friday, May 29, 2009

God: My disbelief

Since yesterday, one question is encircling my mind ... god ... is he for real? When I reached home yesterday, I saw my mom totally glued to the telly and she was watching a mythological soap opera. I asked her to switch the channel to somewhere more useful ... like the CNBC, but she refused. And I asked ... c'mon let me watch CNBC which can actually be of some use. She insisted that let her watch today's episode ... and I gave in. I said OK ... if that serves you good ... then enjoy. My mom was not very amused at my attitude towards god. She told me to have some respect for god. Hmmm ... well I have nothing against god ... because I don't really believe in him/her/it. For a very long time, the concept of god has been a question mark for me. I know I can't prove that god doesn't exist ... but neither can anyone prove its existence. I am one of the minority who doesn't really agree to the idea of a supreme being controlling our lives. I have heard numerous theories on god and its existence ... but I still can't comprehend ... if god exist ... then who made god? If someone created god ... then shouldn't that person be a bigger god? And who made him??? This question have no definite answer. Can't we be open to the theory of co-incidence. May be the universe was created ... just by chance and god has nothing to do with it. I am pretty sure about existence of life beyond planet earth ... and I am pretty sure that they don't worship Jesus/Allah/Ram/Whatever ... so if they don't worship our gods ... then why do we? Do we have different sets of gods for different planets? People say that how can you assume that there is life beyond earth ... and I laugh at them. There are uncountable stars and planets in this universe and to assume that we are the only one is nothing less than stupidity ... I would say downright human arrogance.

Whenever something good happens we praise the lord ... whenever something bad happens ... we pray to the lord. Why??? Why can't we praise/cuss ourselves for our deeds? I am a conspiracy theorist ... I believe that people invented god and mythological literature to keep human beings in check. They presented the concept of heaven and hell so that human beings don't go astray ... be peaceful ... and above all ... god fearing. From childhood ... we are programmed to believe that if we do "good" deeds good things will happen and if we do "bad" things ... the lord will lay his vengeance upon thee. If god is so vengeful ... how is he any better than me? Why do I have to keep on praising him to earn "nirvana". Why do I have to dedicate my life to god to go to heaven ... why can't I live my life the way I want to be ... without the fear of consequences. A god who takes revenge ... who punishes ... is not a god of mine.

With all these ... I still hope that god should exist. If anything ... the concept gives us hope when things are tough ... it gives us something to blame when things don't go our way ... it gives us happiness when things are good. We practically relate everything to god ... so I really hope that he/she/it exist. Else it would be such a shame ... 6 billion people ... 6 billion foolish people.

Peace out !!!

Friday, May 22, 2009

Lets connect

Just came back after meeting Verma and Seth ... high school buds. Verma is in Delhi on a break ... he is doing his MBA. So it was time to catch up with the life. We met at the old market place where we used to hang out after almost every day when we were kids. 3 old buds meeting after god knows how long ... felt great. Its not like that we don’t keep in touch ... we chat ... talk over phone ... exchange e-mails ... scraps ... all the internet social networking one can think of. But to meet them in person ... nothing can beat that. No matter how much we achieve in electronic communication ... nothing can come close to in-person meeting. A simple “hey man whats up” in person is much more fascinating than pages of e-mails or hours on phone. You can truly judge a person’s happiness and excitement when you see the smiles ... the ever changing expressions on a human face.

We human beings are an intriguing species ... so many socio-emotional layers. We are what we are because of our ability to convey and interpret emotions – good or bad. It drives almost every aspect of our lives. No matter how advance we become ... we will always be human first. It makes us tick ... it makes us make sense of it all. Let me explain it in terms of my personal experience – when I was in NYC, I used to talk to my family every day. From my hotel room, I used to chat (even video chats) ... it was almost as if I was in Delhi itself. But that’s the catch ... it was almost like I was there ... but it really wasn’t the same. I may not talk at all when I am at home ... but the mere physical presence brings a very different feeling. I can’t put the feeling in words ... but I hope you get what I mean.

It’s a privilege to be a human being ... it’s a privilege to have friends and family. It’s a privilege to convey and interpret emotions ... lets try to connect as human beings. Lets not always send SMS/tweets/instant messages ... lets meet ... lets connect the way it is supposed to be.

xoxo

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Three Zero: The Beginning

OMG !!! What a weekend (and its aftermath). The relevant world seems to be experiencing some amazing (and sweeping) developments.

First and foremost – yours truly is finally in the 30s club ... an exclusive but somewhat depressing company (d’uh!!!). I would be honest ... I wasn’t too happy about it. On 15th night ... I literally felt like crying. At exact midnight, I received a call from my sis and bro-in-law (expectedly ... the first ones to wish me) and then I heard the voice of my niece ... she also wished me in her own kiddy lingo (albeit forced by my sis ... ahahahaha). My niece is just 17 months old ... she doesn’t care if it’s my birthday or whatever ... she kept on yelling “neenu neenu” (translation ... I want to sleep ... ahahahaha). But when she realized that my sis is having none of it ... she reluctantly said “yappy budday” (translation Happy Birthday ... cho sweeeeeeeeet). If only life can be so cute and sweet all the time.

16th evening ... mom made some delicious pizzas ... I cut a cake (no candles ... thank you very much) and celebrated my life (or should it be AGE) altering birthday with my family ... quite and peaceful. The next day ... it was time to go out and celebrate with some good friends ... and by that I mean ... reason to booze out ... ahahahahaha. So I called up Sonal, Honey and AnnuMan (did not came because of his dental appointment).

16th was general election result day as well ... and beating all the pollsters ... the Congress led UPA gained an unexpected majority. Wuhuu ... I was supporting them ... not because they are the most honest party or whatever ... but more because there is no real alternative. And we need a stable government to handle these turbulent times.

On 18th, the stock market seemed more excited than a kid in a candy store. It raced ... no zoomed ... no went berserk. For the first time in history of secondary markets, the Indian Stock Exchange (both BSE and NSE) hit the upper circuit breakers (twice). Less than a minute of trade happened and the entire day has to be suspended. It is nothing sort of a miracle if you ask me. Who in their right minds would have predicted this ... and that too when the whole world is in recession.

Finally some good news from neighboring country ... Sri Lanka. They ended their decades old civil war by eliminating the militant organization – LTTE. India is surrounded by a very bad (and most dangerous) neighborhood. It is in our favor that some part of it may return to normalcy soon. Amen to that ...

So ... all in all ... a very exciting last 3-4 days. My 30th started with some positive news ... hope the good times just keep on rolling like that.

Cheers !!!

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Three Zero: Prelude

The forthcoming weekend is probably the biggest weekend of this year (so far) because of couple of reasons ... first, second, and third (ahahaha) ... yours truly will touch the (dreaded) milestone of 30 (damn!!! damn!!! damn!!!) ... and India will know the results of marathon general elections.

30 ... three decades ... thirty ... three zero ... that’s a big number isn’t it. I seriously thought that I wont grow up to be 30 ... I would be young forever (really). As usual, my air castle got “Trojaned” by my Achilles ... TIME. People say that age is nothing but a number ... they are fooling themselves. I haven’t found a single reason to cheer ... I just hope that I don’t cry when I cut the cake. It seemed like yesterday when I was in school ... now when I look back ... it feels like a pipedream. Time to wake up and smell my Corex.

I don’t know what I would feel on 16th ... may be I wont care ... may be I would be calm and happy (pretend) ... or may be I would simple loose my mind. The probability of the later is high ... ahahahaha. I will have to find ways to deal with this reality ... a reality which is worse than a nightmare. I urge all of my friend and well wishers ... don’t wish ... don’t try to spin this into some dose of positivity pill. I know this is my malady and I know I will have to find the cure for this itch.

Goodbye sweetness, Goodbye assuage
Welcome moroseness, Welcome malaise
Leaving behind a rudderless life
The road ahead ... still filled with strife


xoxo

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Inhospitable hospital

Doctors ... hospitals ... these words evoke many reactions. Some thinks of them as tools for betterment and a healthy life. For some, they represent illness, sadness ... basically depression. I have a positive outlook towards doctors and hospitals. I regard doctors as the noblest professionals ... and hospitals as holy as a temple/mosque/church. But slowly and slowly I have started to feel little repulsed and perturbed by doctors and hospitals.

A year back, I watched a Michael Moore documentary – Sicko. The documentary was on American health care system. There was on particular scene which left an indelible impression on my mind. In that scene, a guy who accidentally cut off two fingers tells his heart breaking story of how he was asked to choose between reattaching the $12,000 ring finger or the $60,000 middle finger. He was not insured ... so he goes with the ring finger because that was within his budget (and may be he was romantic at heart too). Can you imagine such horror ... if that choice is to be made by you? The hospital could have attached both the fingers ... but they didn’t because he could not pay for it. There was another scene where a doctor (works for an insurance company) confesses that he denied a man an operation and thus caused his death. Stinks isn’t it ... reeks of money and profit.

A similar case of money spinning scam happened to my uncle. He had a fever which was not going away. He consulted his brother (a doctor) and he advised him to get it checked up at a good hospital. He pulled some strings and got my uncle admitted in Apollo (one of the most prestigious hospitals in India). After a barrage of medical tests and checkups, the doctors diagnosed that his chest is filled with water and they would have to pump it out. They operated (sorta) for 3 hours ... used syringes to pump out the water. To my uncle’s bemusement, the doctors at Apollo told him that they misdiagnosed him and there is no water deposit. OK ... so far so good ... but then my uncle asked what really the problem is. They told him that he has TB (tuberculosis). Another round of tests ... and it turned out that he is not suffering from TB either. Another misdiagnosis ... goddamn!!!

My uncle is well off and he went thru every procedure that the doctors suggested. However, the tests and medication were not cheap. Even after spending all this money and going thru mental anguish, the doctors at Apollo are still clueless about his condition. He is now getting treated at some other hospital. But come to think of it ... can you imagine such incompetent doctors at the premium hospital? They were shooting in the dark ... and the hospital was minting money out of my uncle’s misery. Makes me wanna puke.

These days people are scared of falling ill ... not because they are afraid of being unhealthy or whatever ... but more because they would have to visit the hospital. People these days see the hospital as a place to extort money. They pray for their health so that they don’t have to deal with the doctors and go thru all the random tests. The commercialization on health care is absolutely mind numbing and I warn each and every one of you ... check your hospitals before you check in. Even if it’s an Apollo.

Special Mention: Ankur's Apollo Experiance

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Long weekend

4 days of holidays ... wuhu ... but they passed so quickly

7th was the election day in NCR ... I couldn’t vote because my name was not on the voter list. DAMN !!! I changed my residence 6-7 years ago and still they haven’t updated my name on the new locality’s list. I was able to caste my vote last time around (5 years ago) because my name was still on the older list. Now I guess they have re-checked the names and unfortunately my name was struck off. In fact, I applied for my name transfer to the new list ... but it somehow did not appear on it. Well ... typical of governmental work ... slow as snail. May be next time around ... in 5 years ... they will put my name back on the list and I would be able to exercise my democratic right (and duty). Its strange because I do possess a valid voter ID, an updated passport, and the all important (and mandatory) PAN card ... but still I was unable to vote because my name was not on the freakin’ list ... mind blowing. I was pissed because I was unable to get my finger blacked ... but in democracy there is always a next time. That’s why ... democracy rules. Take that all you socialist and dictator ruled countries ... ahahahaha.

8th and 9th passed by in a flash ... I have taken a paid leave on 8th because that will prolong the weekend. On 10th, I and Horny (hehehe ... actual name Honey a.k.a. Arjun) attended Mahi’s (Sonal’s newly born daughter) lunch party. Anshuman was also supposed to join us ... but he did not ... bloody drunkard. I called him at 11 a.m. He did not pick up his phone ... in fact he had it switched off (copied that from me ... ahahaha). I called him again at 12:30 and 12:45 ... still he did not picked his phone. I knew it that he must be in usual weekend super hangover ... and probably wont come. Anyhoo ... finally he called at around 1 and told me that he wont be able to join us. What a surprise ... didnt saw that coming. Actually I suspected this would be Annuman’s response to a “non booze lunch” party. He did the same when DD invited us for the clinic opening ceremony ... again no booze ... again Annuman conveniently skipped it. I can bet my last rupee ... if Sonal’s party involved booze ... he would be there. OK ... back to Mahi’s party ... met Tanushree (Sonal’s wife) and Sonal’s mother there ... they were seeing me after quite a while and both of them told me ... “you have lost SOME weight”. Felt niceeeeeeeeee ... when people comment on your health (in a good way) ... all the hard work that you put behind it ... become worth it.

Tomorrow is another boring workday ... and I am already worried. There are no official holidays for the next 3 months ... DAMN IT. Guess those paid leaves (still have 15 in the kitty) will come handy in this dry (literally) season.

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Rain and chaos

After sweltering weather for about 2-3 weeks, yesterday Delhi-NCR region got some much awaited rain (and hailstorm as bonus). The day started normally ... heat and dust ... but by 3‘o clock, the skies turned dark and grey. I was sitting on my chair ... working (hehe ... really I was) ... and when I looked out the window ... the dark clouds brought a smile on my face. I don’t like summers ... specially Delhi’s summers. It’s hot ... humid ... sometimes absolutely inhospitable. The temperatures can touch 48-49 degrees (hot enough ... ahahahaha). And I am talking about Celsius ... not Fahrenheit. For all those who count in Fs ... it’s nearly 120 degrees (whopping). April experienced an unprecedented heated weather ... breaking 50 years records (stupid global warming ... d’uh). I was hoping and praying that things calm down a bit ... and yesterday rain gods heard my prayers. It rained ... and at some places ... hailstorms.

But something’s gotta give ... with every good thing ... how can bad stuff be left behind. Rain bought chaos ... the traffic went for a tailspin. The roads were chockablock ... traffic was as slow as snail. When I reached ISBT (to catch Metro), I was told that the Rithala (my train) route is not functioning. Due to rain, the line developed some fault (I guess short circuit in some transformer) ... and the line is completely closed. Ufff ... what a bummer. I still got to the platform and ... boy o boy ... the platform was a sea of people. They were still waiting (hoping would be a better choice of word) for the train. The clock kept on displaying 6 minutes as time for arrival (next train). Ahahaha ... I guess to provide false hope ... what a herd. Funny thing ... no body seems to care that whenever the time for the next train becomes 1 minute ... the clock starts showing 6 minutes (reset).
Huge crowd at platform
People rushing to get into the Metro
I asked the Metro staff and he told me that the line is closed for the past 3 hours. He then received some information on his walkie-talkie ... the train is coming. Wuhu !!! Finally the train came ... but I could not got inside. You have to be a superman to get past the huge crowd ... so I though that I will wait for the next train. I kept on waiting ... 15 minutes ... 20 minutes ... but the next train did not come. I lost my patience and got down ... went straight to the underground level and caught the Jehangir Puri metro, which dropped me at Azad Pur station. Its 15 minutes drive from my place ... and my Mamaji (maternal uncle) was already waiting for me (I called him from the train).

One rain ... and the entire city get crippled.

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Hmmm.... fried rice

Weekends means complete shutdown of my system ... I usually don’t do much ... just lie down on my ass and do absolutely nothing. Like most weekend, I was just lying ... watching the telly ... eating ... and yeah you guess it correctly ... doing nothing good. In the evening, I asked mom what is she planning to make for dinner. She told me that she is going to use the leftover white rice (that she made for lunch) and will make me some fried rice. Nice ... I like fried rice ... well I like anything rice. Suddenly, I got up and told her that I would help her to get the dinner ready. She was pleasantly surprised ... partly because I simply am the laziest person in the world when it comes to do house chores ... and partly because I don’t know anything about cooking. The only thing that I can make is tea ... and can make it very well ... thank you very much. Apart from it, I can’t cook to save my life. Being a foodie ... sometimes I feel ashamed of my cooking handicap. And I am a really fussy eater too ... I can’t eat everything and everyplace. Sometimes I can really be a nightmare when it comes to food. I have decided to learn cooking ... but I never really made any effort to learn it. Today when mom told me about fried rice ... I asked her how hard it is to make it and she told me that its really easy ... so I though what the heck ... why not start learning ... the easy way.

Click here for bigger pictureLike she told me ... cooking fried rice turned out to be easy ... and quick too. I started with heating three-four teaspoon of soybean oil in a कड़ाही (wok) and add राई (mustard seeds) and जीरा (cumin seeds), one teaspoon each. Add a small bowl of कटे हुए प्याज (chopped onions) and हरे मटर (green peas). You can also add शिमला मिर्च (capsicum) and/or गाजर (carrots) ... anything that goes well with rice. Now add some हल्दी (turmeric), लाल मिर्च (red chilly powder), and some नमक (salt), as per your taste (I added one teaspoon each). Heat everything well for about 5 minutes (or till the onions gets little brownish texture). Now add the leftover चावल (white rice), add some नींबू का रस (lemon juice) and धनिया पत्ती (parsley) ... mix everything well.

Click here for bigger pictureVoila !!! Nice ... healthy ... light and awesomely tasty fried rice is ready to be gulped ... yummy. You can eat it with पापड (popadum) ... like most Marwaris do. We had enough rice to make a dinner for 3 out of the leftovers ... it tasted great and mom didn’t had to slog for hours too. Nice, easy and quick ... mission accomplished. Now that I know that cooking can be fun and not so hard ... I think I will learn few more dishes.