Being Vegetarian

While coming to office I saw this horrendous act of “humanity”. A total WTF!!!
I am a hardcore vegetarian and cruelty towards animals hurts me physically ... emotionally ... physiologically ... any other ally one can think of. Couple of moths back I was watching a show where they showed how meat is obtained. Firstly, they showed the old fashioned way to cut an animal into meat pieces. The cow/pigs are butchered live ... one of the most shocking things that I have ever seen. Then they showed how “modern” ways ... whereby a pig is given an electric shock so that he becomes numb and then the pig is hung on a hook and a butcher slits the throat. I get nightmares just by imagining that sight. Oh how have the humanity progressed ... we even kill an innocent animal in a civilized manner. Stuff like this makes me even more determined to never eat any meat.

Whenever I go abroad ... the first question that people asks me that what you eat to survive. I always say that if you look for it ... vegetarian food is not that hard to find. The choices may be limited ... but enough to keep you honest. Many of my friends enjoys meat (couple of them are born to eat meat only ... ahahaha ... yall know who you are). I distinctly remember that once ... I and a very good friend of mine (Verma) ... were hanging around and suddenly he saw a meat shop. He went inside ... ordered some pork slices ... and ate it. I was ... like OMFG ... that was wrong on so many levels. I don’t know what got into me ... but I was totally shocked and pissed off. I scolded him like a school teacher ... gave him a serious talk down. Couple of weeks after that, he told me that he quit eating meat. Don’t think that he did it because of my outburst ... but he did quit and he is a veggie till date. NICEEE !!!

Being born in Marwari family, I was raised a vegetarian. I did try to dabble with non-veg but I could not go beyond eggs. I would be honest ... it tasted good but the feeling of guilt was so strong that I could not try it again. This is perhaps the only rule that I have followed throughout my life (so far ... so good). Would I be tempted to eat meat ... hell yeah ... that darn thing looks so delicious ... but would I be able to eat it ... I don’t (and hope) think so.

Dreams and Aims

Yesterday, while going back home ... I bumped into couple of my colleagues (Vidhi and Amit) in Metro. During our conversation, a question popped up that what is the aim of life. Hmm ... got me thinking. Vidhi said that her aim of life is not much ... she has a decent job ... earning decent salary ... and down the line she would get married and settle down. Don’t get me wrong ... I am not being a sexist ... but this is usually the typical answer of most Indian girls ... or at least most of the girls that I have talked to. Either ways, this seems kinda ... ummm ... what do you say ... you know what I mean ... not very enthralling (to say the least). I said to her that this cannot be the aim of life ... it is a routine of life ... but cannot be aim of life. She said that what else is there ... you would also get married ... have kids ... and that is basically IT. I said NOOOO ... not it. But then when I was brainstorming ... I realized that I too do not have any/many aim(s) of life. I have many dreams but don’t think I can call them aims. Or can I ... lemme think ... hmmm

Growing up, I had a dream of making it big (I mean be stinking rich ... so stinking that Armani produces a scent with my name on it). When I was young(er), I know what I have to become but did not had a clue about the means. As I got wiser, I was fascinated with the idea of having my own chain of pubs. I would call that an aim of life ... but I haven’t made any effort towards achieving it ... so it’s still a pipedream. So what next ...

I’ve been to NYC and I loved that city. If there is any place on earth that I really (reallllyyy!!!) wanna live, it has to be NY. Although it doesn’t seem like much ... but it is an immediate aim of mine. And I am working towards it ... its just that I had the worse luck in the world ... it might take a while before I visit my dream city. So yeah ... a short term aim of life is getting back there.

Kewl ... so I have the ball rolling ... what else ... what else ...

Another aim of my life is to bring joy in people’s lives ... specially my family and near and dear ones. More specifically ... when I be rolling in dough (sooner the better ... ahahahaha) ... I would like to adopt my ancestral village and transform it for betterment. It’s a small village with no real amenities. I remember as a kid I use to hate visiting that place because there were no proper roads ... no telephones ... no electricity (I don’t count 2 hours of electricity as electricity) ... no education ... and above all no TV (c'mon a kid needs to see his cartoon shows). But my father loved that place ... I always wondered why. He use to go to the chaupal (an area where prominent villagers gather) ... talk to elders ... play cards ... have cuppas ... conversations after conversations ... fun. Now that I have grown older (a little) I can see why. Like every village, the comradery among fellow villagers is very heart warming ... everyone knows each other ... basically an extended family. Its hard to find the love and affection inside the city walls. So I would like to bring a change in their lives ...

There are plenty of other small and big things which I have in my mind ... I know a lifetime may be too short to achieve all of them. But I would try ...

Farewell MJ

What a dreadful start to the day ... King of Pop is no more.

Since it was Friday, I was happy while coming to the office ... even though the Metro was crowded than usual ... I was still happy and listening to the radio (usually 95FM) ... and suddenly Sharthak (RJ) announced that today they would be paying tribute to MJ because he passed away. And I was like ... WTF ... this can’t be happening ... I must have misheard him. So I switched the channel to 102.6FM and there I heard “Bad” ... and I then knew that MJ is truly gone. The RJ re-confirmed it. I was pissed because the RJ showed no emotions ... he simply said that today MJ died and we are gonna play few of his songs ... and then took some requests and laughed. I mean ... OK ... being a RJ ... you gotta entertain people ... but why do they forget that it is only because of the musicians their channel is in the air ... they should have showed some respect ... and this is MJ we are talking about ... the biggest star/entertainer/musician of this century. Anyways ... I guess I was pissed more because of the news that MJ is no more ... what a bummer.

I was (still am because music will never die) a big MJ fan. When I say I am a fan, I mean I am a fan of his music. I never judged him for all the allegations or his eccentricities ... they don’t concerns/bothers me. I loved his music and I am not ashamed to admit that. I still remember that when I was really young and living in a small village ... where no one ever heard of any English music ... I saw his album “Thriller” in front of the cassette player (those were the days ... ahhh). I curiously picked it up and saw this strange looking man on the cover of it. Probably I was 6-7 years old then ... and I never heard any English song nor have I seen any English music album. I looked around and I asked my mom who is he ... she said she don’t know ... may be Kishan Kaka (my uncle) bought the cassette ... he must be knowing. Anyways ... I played the cassette and I was instantly hooked. Never mind I could not understand a single word he was saying ... but such was the magic in his music. As time went by ... and I shifted to Delhi ... the first album that I bought was ... you guessed it right ... a MJ album ... “Dangerous”. And today I have every hit MJ song in my collection.

Lately his life was in turmoil ... with child abuse court cases ... his albums not doing well ... his surgeries ... his change of faith (he died a Muslim if you care to know) ... things were not looking up for him. Whenever you talk about him or even about his music, people raised their eyebrows ... but why must they forget that the guy gave some wonderful music. He was (and forever will be) known as “King of Pop” for a reason. Why do people judge him for all the other stuff ... which frankly is none of anyone’s concerns. He was king and forever will be ... and it would be hard to get someone like him anytime soon. Recently he tried to put his house in order by planning a series of shows to get him out of debt troubles. He named the tour as “This is it” tour ... how ironical. Well the man is gone ... but I know his music will live forever.

Rest in peace MJ and thank you for the music.

Three Zero: The Beginning

OMG !!! What a weekend (and its aftermath). The relevant world seems to be experiencing some amazing (and sweeping) developments.

First and foremost – yours truly is finally in the 30s club ... an exclusive but somewhat depressing company (d’uh!!!). I would be honest ... I wasn’t too happy about it. On 15th night ... I literally felt like crying. At exact midnight, I received a call from my sis and bro-in-law (expectedly ... the first ones to wish me) and then I heard the voice of my niece ... she also wished me in her own kiddy lingo (albeit forced by my sis ... ahahahaha). My niece is just 17 months old ... she doesn’t care if it’s my birthday or whatever ... she kept on yelling “neenu neenu” (translation ... I want to sleep ... ahahahaha). But when she realized that my sis is having none of it ... she reluctantly said “yappy budday” (translation Happy Birthday ... cho sweeeeeeeeet). If only life can be so cute and sweet all the time.

16th evening ... mom made some delicious pizzas ... I cut a cake (no candles ... thank you very much) and celebrated my life (or should it be AGE) altering birthday with my family ... quite and peaceful. The next day ... it was time to go out and celebrate with some good friends ... and by that I mean ... reason to booze out ... ahahahahaha. So I called up Sonal, Honey and AnnuMan (did not came because of his dental appointment).

16th was general election result day as well ... and beating all the pollsters ... the Congress led UPA gained an unexpected majority. Wuhuu ... I was supporting them ... not because they are the most honest party or whatever ... but more because there is no real alternative. And we need a stable government to handle these turbulent times.

On 18th, the stock market seemed more excited than a kid in a candy store. It raced ... no zoomed ... no went berserk. For the first time in history of secondary markets, the Indian Stock Exchange (both BSE and NSE) hit the upper circuit breakers (twice). Less than a minute of trade happened and the entire day has to be suspended. It is nothing sort of a miracle if you ask me. Who in their right minds would have predicted this ... and that too when the whole world is in recession.

Finally some good news from neighboring country ... Sri Lanka. They ended their decades old civil war by eliminating the militant organization – LTTE. India is surrounded by a very bad (and most dangerous) neighborhood. It is in our favor that some part of it may return to normalcy soon. Amen to that ...

So ... all in all ... a very exciting last 3-4 days. My 30th started with some positive news ... hope the good times just keep on rolling like that.

Cheers !!!

Three Zero: Prelude

The forthcoming weekend is probably the biggest weekend of this year (so far) because of couple of reasons ... first, second, and third (ahahaha) ... yours truly will touch the (dreaded) milestone of 30 (damn!!! damn!!! damn!!!) ... and India will know the results of marathon general elections.

30 ... three decades ... thirty ... three zero ... that’s a big number isn’t it. I seriously thought that I wont grow up to be 30 ... I would be young forever (really). As usual, my air castle got “Trojaned” by my Achilles ... TIME. People say that age is nothing but a number ... they are fooling themselves. I haven’t found a single reason to cheer ... I just hope that I don’t cry when I cut the cake. It seemed like yesterday when I was in school ... now when I look back ... it feels like a pipedream. Time to wake up and smell my Corex.

I don’t know what I would feel on 16th ... may be I wont care ... may be I would be calm and happy (pretend) ... or may be I would simple loose my mind. The probability of the later is high ... ahahahaha. I will have to find ways to deal with this reality ... a reality which is worse than a nightmare. I urge all of my friend and well wishers ... don’t wish ... don’t try to spin this into some dose of positivity pill. I know this is my malady and I know I will have to find the cure for this itch.

Goodbye sweetness, Goodbye assuage
Welcome moroseness, Welcome malaise
Leaving behind a rudderless life
The road ahead ... still filled with strife

xoxo

Hmmm.... fried rice

Weekends means complete shutdown of my system ... I usually don’t do much ... just lie down on my ass and do absolutely nothing. Like most weekend, I was just lying ... watching the telly ... eating ... and yeah you guess it correctly ... doing nothing good. In the evening, I asked mom what is she planning to make for dinner. She told me that she is going to use the leftover white rice (that she made for lunch) and will make me some fried rice. Nice ... I like fried rice ... well I like anything rice. Suddenly, I got up and told her that I would help her to get the dinner ready. She was pleasantly surprised ... partly because I simply am the laziest person in the world when it comes to do house chores ... and partly because I don’t know anything about cooking. The only thing that I can make is tea ... and can make it very well ... thank you very much. Apart from it, I can’t cook to save my life. Being a foodie ... sometimes I feel ashamed of my cooking handicap. And I am a really fussy eater too ... I can’t eat everything and everyplace. Sometimes I can really be a nightmare when it comes to food. I have decided to learn cooking ... but I never really made any effort to learn it. Today when mom told me about fried rice ... I asked her how hard it is to make it and she told me that its really easy ... so I though what the heck ... why not start learning ... the easy way.

Like she told me ... cooking fried rice turned out to be easy ... and quick too. I started with heating three-four teaspoon of soybean oil in a कड़ाही (wok) and add राई (mustard seeds) and जीरा (cumin seeds), one teaspoon each. Add a small bowl of कटे हुए प्याज (chopped onions) and हरे मटर (green peas). You can also add शिमला मिर्च (capsicum) and/or गाजर (carrots) ... anything that goes well with rice. Now add some हल्दी (turmeric), लाल मिर्च (red chilly powder), and some नमक (salt), as per your taste (I added one teaspoon each). Heat everything well for about 5 minutes (or till the onions gets little brownish texture). Now add the leftover चावल (white rice), add some नींबू का रस (lemon juice) and धनिया पत्ती (parsley) ... mix everything well.

Voila !!! Nice ... healthy ... light and awesomely tasty fried rice is ready to be gulped ... yummy. You can eat it with पापड (popadum) ... like most Marwaris do. We had enough rice to make a dinner for 3 out of the leftovers ... it tasted great and mom didn’t had to slog for hours too. Nice, easy and quick ... mission accomplished. Now that I know that cooking can be fun and not so hard ... I think I will learn few more dishes.

Basement and Super Sitare

After a long time, the basement gang got together yesterday and had some fun. The basement gang – Me, Gaurav, Payal, and Vihan – was formed in the basement of GL (hence not so clever name for our group ... ahahahaha). When I joined GL in June 2005, I got the Bowstreet project. Gaurav, Vihan, and Payal were also new to the project. Even though the entire project got on famously, we 4 really formed a good rapport and we remained good friends even after all these years. Gradually, most of us left GL, but that doesn’t meant that we didn’t met ... although the frequency of our get-togethers have decreased over the period of time, but we still do meet and party once in a while.
Yesterday was one such fun filled night. Couple of days back I was chatting with Payal and I told her that it has been a while since we all met ... and since all of them are in India (which is rare these days), we should seize the moment and party. So we all gathered at Super Star (we call it Super Sitare ... ahahaha) ... had little bit of booze and food (yeah ... just enough to get filled and soaked ... ahahaha). The masti (fun), the jokes, pulling each other’s leg, booze, food, catching up with life and work, the cheque fights ... aah ... good old days. We all decided to take a break and go somewhere ... the plan was for the coming weekend, but Gaurav’s has a family function to attend. So the plan is postponed by a week ... so I am hoping nothing else comes up.

I miss can't haves

After coming back from London, I have been bingeing a lot. This makes me wonder ... why? Before going to London, I was on a controlled diet to make myself healthy. But after coming back, I have been eating like I never ate before. The only rationale that I can think of is that I didn’t had the option of eating home made food in London. This might sounds little weird, but it is the truth. My mind plays such games – when I stay at home, I don’t eat food like daal-chawal (pulses-rice), rotis (Indian bread), etc. I prefer to eat salads and fruits to keep my weight in check. But when I came back, I just ate and ate over the weekend. The thing is – I started missing solid food when I did not had a choice ... weird isn’t it. Similarly, when I stay at home, many a times I don’t interact with family ... probably I take them for granted ... my bad. But when I was there I missed my family ... dearly. Again, the rational remains the same. I feel the worth of things only when they are not near to me or when I know that I can’t have it. I feel restless ... it drives me crazy.

Is it human nature to miss things when they are not near or is it just me?

An unusual tea break

In the morning, I felt an urge to have my cuppa tea. So I got down (my office is on the 4th floor) and asked the chai walla (tea vendor) to make a cup of strong tea. As I was standing near the thella (cart) – sipping my cuppa and enjoying the winter morning sun – suddenly a thought crossed my mind. I should shed the doubts about the office and start enjoying the place. I decided that I would work as hard as I could possibly can. Its kinda eerie to get such feelings ... specially related to WORK ... but then I guess it is all because of that damn article that I read before coming down for the tea. I read an article about the impact of recession on jobs. Na Na ... wait a minute ... don’t think that I’m afraid or anything ... but when I realized that so many people have lost or are loosing their jobs (possibly their livelihood) ... I felt that I should be thankful to still have a job. I read all the comments that were posted in that article and realized that things are really bad for few people. Few days back I read similar kind of article where they documented the daily life of a couple in US. Due to recession and scarcity of jobs, they were forced to stay apart just to make enough money for their family. In fact, the couple lived on separate continents for their jobs. I know its not a common thing, but this simply shows the extremes of the recession. Poeple are forced to live apart, do crummy jobs, get minimum wage, salary cuts, loss of social life, Et cetera Et cetera. When I compare my life with all those who are in distress, I feel lucky ... in a strange way. Here I’m cribbing about the dull work environment and boring colleagues. I just asked few questions to myself ... and I decided that as long as I am here, I would stop cribbing and start bettering myself. Yeah Ankur you are right ... there is still plenty to learn and do ... I read your comment in my last post.

I have given myself 6 months to either like the work and office ... or I should be good enough to move on. And for that, I would have to be a “super star” performer. So I have decided that within these 6 months, I would gain knowledge (possibly do couple of QA related certifications as well), will work hard (be an indispensible “worker”) and stop worrying. The doubts that I have about this new office are not that big ... they shouldn't act as deterrents. Anyhoo ... got the UK visa today and most probably I would be in London by next week (did I hear globe trotter !!!).

Talking about London ... one of the reasons I did not join the family business was exactly this. I always wanted to travel different cities, countries, continents. I also knew that if I join the business, it would be very hard for me to go to such places. First I saw New York and now London ... wuuuuhuuu ... suddenly life seems all right. You win some and you loose some.

Waiting for winters

Its 9th December and still Delhi is waiting for its famous winters. The day temperatures are still in mid-high 20s (ºC) and nights are still reeling under double figure temperatures ... way above normal. Dilli ki sardi (Delhi’s winter) is legendary among Indians, especially the Hindi speaking folks. Delhi is like a weather lab where one gets to experience the 2 main seasons – summer and winter – to the extreme. If summers burn you with near 50 degrees, winters can freeze you with near 0 degree. Not many places on this planet can boost of such a huge temp-range ... one of the reasons why I love Delhi. No wonder we Dilliwalas (Delhiites) can go to any place without fearing the weather gods. When I was in NYC last year (in winter season), even the day temp use to be near 0ºC. The hotel I stayed in was inhabited by many south Indians (who never really experience winters back home). Those folks were not very comfortable in such conditions. I, on the other hand, enjoyed the winters immensely. Not that we get such chilly conditions back home, but it was easier for me to adapt. Similarly, I have seen so many foreigners apply bucket load of sunscreen lotions and drinking tanks full of liquids when they visit my city in summers (to enjoy Indian summers ... huh!!!) even in April. Where as we Delhiites don’t even flinch in June-July, when the Sun seems to be really HOT (literally).

I hail from a small village (Kanuta) in Churu district, Rajasthan (adjoining state), which also has a similar weather pattern. Churu have always been in the news for weather reasons. It boosts of the highest and lowest temps in India (for plain regions). In fact, the variation in the minimum and maximum temperature may very well be greatest for any place in the world. Having made Delhi my home and my karma bhoomi (land of my actions), I adapted its culture and weather like a hand in a glove. Like every hardcore Delhiite, I too enjoy a good (and lazy) night sleep in rajayi (quilt) and drinking garam garam chai (hot tea) along with pakore (Indian snack). Aaahhhh ... absolute bliss

I love it when I struggle to see in the dense fog (pollution also plays a part in it) ... I love it when I shiver while driving (never used the heater option in my car ... never ever) ... I love it when it gets dark at 6’o clock in the evening, I love it when the sun don’t shine for days and I love it when I actually miss the sun. So many things that I want to feel and yet the winters are not here. Damn !!!

I am perfect ... NOT

Few things that I should change (keyword is SHOULD – whether I will do anything about them or not is another story ... probably another post ... LOL):

• I’m very selfish. I only think or do only those things that are beneficial to me.
• I don’t think about others feelings or welfare that much (if any). Seldom have I done anything good for others. Charity or going out of the way to help others ... I guess I don’t know about such noble deeds.
• I just don’t care about what others think about me or expects anything from me. Well not caring for others is not a bad quality, but if you know me you will know what I’m talking about. I have taken this so-called bad quality to a whole new level.
• If I don’t like anything, I just DON’T like it. I don’t even try to look for reasons or justifications for doing so. Even if I try to look at it from different perspective, I would still hate it – even if hating it hurts me.
• I can’t pretend. Even harmless pretension is an unknown thing for me.
• I’m very blunt – in fact, I’m rude. If something is on my mind, you will hear it. And while doing so, I don’t mince words.
• I am a pretty shallow kind of a guy. I know that I’m not perfect, but I always want perfect things.
• I’m temperamental. I tend to get angry at things that bother me and I can be pretty scary when I’m in hulk-mode.
• I’m lazy. Although I’ve paid a very heavy price for it, I still am as lazy as an old dog sleeping by the fire.
• I am the hardest person on this earth to please. If something good happens to me, I scrutinize it to death ... so much so it soon becomes a non-event. Well this is not my fault ... life hasn’t been too kind to me. In 29 years of my existence, I’ve seen/gone thru some pretty hard things. I just can’t believe that some good thing can actually happen to me.
• I don’t forgive and I never forget.

There are a million things that I would like to change or do differently, but if I can change even the ones that I just said, I would be a better person.

Jajs Dieting

Its been almost a month since I've been dieting (religiously). Phew !!! I've not eaten normal food (read typical Indian - Marwari food) for so long now that I don't even miss it. In the last 30 days or so, I've lost 7 kgs (little over 15 pounds). Yessssssssss. Last month when I checked my weight, I was shocked to see that I've gained considerably. Once I got out of that shock, I decided to do something about it. Well I am an emotional eater (kinda) and exercise was never my thing (where is the time ??? ahem ...). All I have is strong willpower. So I decided that I will cut down on unhealthy food and will adopt a healthy lifestyle. For the last 1 month I've been eating - Corn, Cucumber, Tomato, Cabbage, Sprouts, Grams, Beans, Apple, Orange, Papaya ... basically fruits and vegetables along with stuff like Popcorn and Puffed Rice. I try to eat 'em raw as much as possible. If at all - only olive oil is used and that too very sparingly. I even try to drink sugar-less tea (2 cups/day max). I have completly chucked wheat or anyting made out of it, milk and milk products, rice, stuff like potato and banana, sweets and desserts, chocolates ... basically all things that makes me fat (but darn tasty ... buhuuuu). For the past couple of weeks, I've been doing little bit of jogging in the morning as well. The results are encouraging and I hope to continue this regimen for couple of months more. My target is to loose 20kgs (45 pounds). So 7 down... 13 more to go.

Wish me luck !!!

Poking nose into

After suffering for god knows how long I visited an ENT specialist yesterday. For as long as I care to remember, I have been prone to common cold, nose bleeding, and excessive sneezing. And for the past one month, my throat was aching like hell. Anyhooo ... the doc told me that I am suffering from Granular Pharyngitis and Allergic Rhinitis. D’uh !!!

OK OK I know these terms sounds like big fuckups. Calm down ... nothing like that ... I’m suffering from acute allergic reaction. Funny thing ... h’uh ... you won’t believe but I knew about my allergy for a very long time ... but whenever I use to tell anyone (including my mom), they thought that I was being ‘snotty’. Haaa !!! how yall like me now ... I told yall that I just can’t handle all this dust and pollution in India ... I was not lying people ... Anyhooo, bad news is that there is no permanent solution of this irritant ... so I may have to pop pills for life. On a lighter side, this may be my first long term commitment with anything ... hahahaha

C yall soon ... have a good night